House of Pain (surgeries/injuries)

[hurlingdervish]

so i went to a couple of doctors today to get this bulbous protrusion checked out on my finger.

turned out to be "one of the worst ingrown nails" the nurse had ever seen.

i was told by the doctor to go to a surgeon "yesterday" as since today was already waiting too long

so i get to the surgeon and the guy tells me that he is going to cauterize it with a chemical burn

sounds nice and easy enough

so he gets back with some silver nitrate on a big matchstick looking thing. then he proceeds to stab in between my finger and nail with them relentlessly. not only did it feel like my finger was in a vice with spikes, the silver nitrate added a burn element to the mix. i probably should have had some anesthesic, if the doctor had time for that nonsense that is .

i would have told him the location of the rebel base, if i was withholding such information.

so now lets hear your pain stories kiddos.

[ellaguru]

for now no big pain stories (by chance) for me HD
hope you go well now, you little sidechain magician...

[wax inspektor]

...you know I was 14 or sth. and the coolest thing on the court at the time was it to flip trash baskets to jump from them to slam it like shaq...

one time the distance was too far my fat ass so I didn't made it to bball-basket and broke my 2 wrists... the funny thing was the the court always was closed so I had to go over the fence to get back home... damn painful with 2 broken hands... u can't imagine how fucked up it is to make your toilet business with two plastered hands... foil is your friend...
but in the same summer there was this Germany wide MarioKart64 battle and I become the best player of my town /with 2 plastered hands ....
2 thumbs and the pointing fingers were "flexible"... enuff for driftin and shooting. it was the biggest success in my youth... and def a story I tell everybody I meet... .drunken or not...

[drewzle]

I didn't made it to bball-basket and broke my 2 wrists... the funny thing was the the court always was closed so I had to go over the fence to get back home... damn painful with 2 broken hands... u can't imagine how fucked up it is to make your toilet business with two plastered hands...

damn man!

[hurlingdervish]

@ guru
didnt u just have a baby?

one time the distance was too far my fat ass so I didn't made it to bball-basket and broke my 2 wrists... the funny thing was the the court always was closed so I had to go over the fence to get back home...

thats so fucked

[Rhua]

Oh man Wax... Best thing I've heard this year!

[ellaguru]

@ guru
didnt u just have a baby?

...i got 2...
but it' not a pain story...

[crumbsucker]

3 years ago I went on routine operation of gallstones... o my, that is pain; compared to toothake the pain is X2.
... that routine surgical job turned into worst nightmare in my life. When I was awake from anestesia the surgeon told me he first tryed newest method (laparotomy)
and he couldnt do it, than they went old way ... cut is like 30 cm long and 15 stiches. After 2 days in hospital I got constant fever and my body started to turn red. Man, I was in such pain... like burning inside. First they didn't know what is wrong with me and than they did some more examinations and it turns out i've got Necrotizing fasciitis in surgical room ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Necrotizing_fasciitis )
... so they opened me once again plus I've got another 10cm long scar, and removed some of the worst infected flesh. Since it was second anestesia in a few days they hardly woke me up from operation. When I was awake I realize I have respirator in my throat, a tube in my dick, 2 bottles of some liquid in my vains... I was on machines
for like 10 days and all I could do was move my eyes. Luckily, I quickly got better as anti-biotic started to work.
Im very lucky to be alive.

[Rhua]

Holy cow, that's some heavy stuff... Good that you made it through that!

Worst thing I had to go through would be the removal of my tonsils, that was the first time in my life I had to go to a hospital but it wasn't that bad at all.

[hurlingdervish]

@crumbs

thats just






but

i've got Necrotizing fasciitis

sounds like some sort of magical spell

[Les Braun]

I got kicked in the balls once.


EDIT: I just read crumb's post...holy shit, that really sucks, man.

[cartesia]

does it turn people into necro-fascists?


I dont have any pain stories to rival you guys crazy surgery etc..

unless you count the irony of withdrawals from opiate painkillers.. most painful thing ive ever done!
Imagine if every muscle in your neck and joints was sprained, you have the worst hangover-headache of your life, your body is so hot and frazzled that you're hallucinating (in a bad kinda demented way - like i thougth my blanket was a matrix of canned vegetable cans.. and i had to arrange it right like a puzzle before i would be allowed get to sleep.).. yet you feel freezing cold (yes.. its true haha). . ............
your crap turns to liquid for so long that it stings like bleach on an open wound for the week...
time slows to a crawl, so it seems like all this lasts for a lifetime...

At the time, there is nothing worse I could think of.. I can't imagine how people taking heroin and higher strength opiates would manage to ever make it through withdrawal... I can do it on my own (if im forced due to money etc) but the drugs i take are like 1/10 the strength.

...somehow after its over, it still seems worth it for all the months/years of highness you get till you next have a few days of not bein able to get sorted...

[ColeRockLee]

Crazy shit guys. I've only had surgery once, when I was a kid. I had to have a small piece of glass removed from inside my knee. Turns out it had been in there for a year or so. Didn't really hurt or anything.

The real pain however was more or less getting hit by a car. It (obviously) wasn't goin fast enough to kill me. The car was slowing down and I got this bright idea to jump on the hood and freak everybody out. When you land on the hood of a moving car it doesn't have to stop just because you were stupid enough to think it would. I flipped over as soon as I landed and tried to roll off but the windshield and passenger side mirror caught me and sent me flying. I landed flat on my back in the street just in time for the rear wheel to run over my right hand too. I felt I'd been hit with a cannonball shot but I managed to get up and limp away, albeit very slowly. It was a situation where I couldn't help but smile despite how bad it hurt. I'd just lived through the dumbest shit I'd ever done in my life, without any lasting injuries. Don't try this at home.

[hurlingdervish]

@cartesia

imagine the people who do the fentanyl stuff

worst i go though is when i forget to refill my gov't issued speed aka adderall

oversleep by 6 hours + intense dreams, haha. it amazes me that amphetamine is legal. (dumb ass doctors )


@hema

you numbnuts!! thats so awful but kind of funny because it was so retarded .

reminds me of bombing down a hill on a skateboard, luge style, and slamming into the back of a trailer after taking a turn

[cartesia]

@cartesia

imagine the people who do the fentanyl stuff

worst i go though is when i forget to refill my gov't issued speed aka adderall

oversleep by 6 hours + intense dreams, haha. it amazes me that amphetamine is legal. (dumb ass doctors )

Yeah man... the world is crazy like that.. so many fucked up prescription medications.. all the side effects etc.. insanity.

... and that fentanyl business... jesus.. if u got onto that stuff it would be game over for the rest of your life